Heartbreak. The first woman to break my heart was a friend in college. I thought we would be besties but they distanced themselves from me when I started questioning my sexuality. I had never been rejected by someone who I thought knew me and understood me so well. Never imagined they would stop talking to me just because I wasn’t as straight as I thought i was or as straight as we were taught to be. I miss them hope they’re well. Friends can break your heart as badly as lovers this is the lesson she taught me.
Heat Rises
Fire flames and heat rise in the pit of my stomach when I see you
when I think about How you stabbed me with your words
How you sliced me with your phrases and crucified me with a look of indignation
They don’t know but I do
They can’t see but I can
secrets lies and old wounds oh how they burn
They molt through the lining of my belly , melt down my pride and expose my shame
Now the high temperatures of my anger are eroding my joy
and stripping me of my happiness
Leaving me naked and bare
I have nothing left to give
As a flaming ball of anger is how I live
Don’t come to close i just might explode
My frustrations will spill over onto you and corrupt your peace
Contort it and transform your contentment into resentment
Because my satisfaction has been spent
I can feel heat rising as you walk my way
and the fire of hurt as you cross my path
There is a flame that fans every time you smile
and a tear that falls when I think about how I said goodbye
The fire was started by the hurt you vocalized
and the wrongs you say I perpetrated?
and though it is at my hands that this inferno is orchestrated
It is at the sight of you that it is elated.
-dirtyartboi 2013
Dirty Art Boi 